Perhaps because I tend to work with high achieving and aspirational men, a lot of my clients work far too hard than is good for them. One of the questions I often ask these men is whether, at their memorial service, do they want to be remembered as someone who “worked hard”? Often the answer is NO!
I was intrigued therefore, by a new book by Bronnie Ware called ‘The Top Five Regrets of the Dying’. Bronnie had worked in palliative care in Australia, and asked the dying people she worked with their main regrets. The top five most common regrets were:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish I had let myself be happier.
I’m sure there is something on this list for all of us. What would your main regret be?
Dr Phil Tyson is a Men's Psychotherapist based in Manchester in the UK. He offers:
- Cognitive behavioural therapy (cbt) for men in Manchester
- Counselling for men in Manchester
- Psychotherapy for men in Manchester
- Telephone and Skype counselling for men wherever you live
- Supervision and consultative support for therapists in Manchester
- Mediation for employment disputes in Manchester and the UK